Nathanael's 3 months old already! How did that happen!!? He is now giggling, which is so stinkin' cute! He likes us to play peek-a-boo. I know I'm biased, but he is such a cute little guy. I cannot get over him! I think he's slept in his own crib for 2 nights in his whole life. The other nights, he's in my bed. I'm trying to get his sleeping habits under control, and things have slightly improved since I put him on a flexible schedule.
Our kitchen renovations are still moving along. We.will.never.renovate.again. (at least, that's how I feel right now!). It is an unbelievable amount of work and such an inconvenience. I can't wait to get back to the days where I won't be washing dishes in the tub. yuck. it just grosses me out. However, I must say I am very pleased with how things are looking so far. I like the new layout and the new cabinets. I cannot wait for it all to be over, though. I think it will be worth it in the end.
I still have about 15 pounds of baby weight to lose. It is taking SO long to lose it this time, which is frustrating me. I thought by now I'd be back to my pre-pregnancy weight. However, with all the kitchen renovations and sleep deprivation, it is much harder to find/make time to workout. I am working out again but need to get more consistent with it to see better results. I'm trying to keep it all in perspective, though.
I'm trying to be more disciplined about going to bed earlier....which reminds me...I need to get to bed now. One of these "slower" days I will try to post some pictures of our progress for you all. :-)
P.S. Anyone else really dislike the new blogger layout??
Our kitchen is slowly coming together, not without its fair share of hiccups along the way, of course. Hopefully by the end of this week we will have the cabinets in and the counter ordered.
Here are the low-maintenance meals planned for this week:
Being a mother is hard work. I truly had no idea just how difficult this job would be at times. I must admit that I am struggling lately with exhaustion and just an overwhelming feeling of complete inadequacy. I have a fussy baby. No, he's not colicky - just fussy. And he does not sleep. Well not very much, anyway. 45 minutes at a time is typical. 2 - 3 hours of consecutive sleep? Unheard of for the past month or so. I truly feel like I'm mothering (every time I go to type this, I type "mothing" !) in the trenches these days. I'm surely not the only mother who's ever felt this way. I am up over 10 times between midnight and 4:30 a.m. many nights. Of course, just as Nathanael is falling asleep, I hear Elianna call for me, "Mom, mom, I'm thirsty. Mom, I'm cold. Can you tuck my toes in?"....Finally after an hour or so, she's back to sleep and by that time Nathanael is crying again, so I just crash with Nathanael in bed around 4:30 a.m., falling asleep for the first time and sleep till about 7:30 a.m. That's typical these days. Oh dear. I just realized that I'm complaining...oops...sorry about that :-).
There are many moments these days that I'd like to just bury my head under the covers and have a good cry out of sheer exhaustion and desperation.
I feel like I'm just coasting along, trying to survive this phase of life. I would much prefer to be thriving rather than just surviving.
I'm aware that time is passing by much too quickly, and I feel like I'm not 100% totally here as a mother & wife, if you know what I mean. It's not a good thing. I need to be here for my kids & husband. Not just physically, but mentally & emotionally. I need to be 100% here.
Writing this post is not that easy. I mean, I'd like to pretend I'm a fantastic wife & mother and have it all together all the time, but that is definitely not true. Is it okay to admit we are weak and weary? Is it okay to admit that we are sinners under the grace of God who still lose our patience at times and are tempted to sink into self-pity and the occasional feeling of "why me"? Don't get me wrong; I'm not proud of my sin. I certainly believe that if we are living by the power of the Holy Spirit, we Christians will be given strength to be patient, even when we don't feel like it, even when we are so tired. I need grace. I need to to cry out to God for strength and for wisdom. I need to admit that I am NOT a perfect person; I am a desperately needy person.
Psalm 142:6 "Listen to my cry, for I am in desperate need..."
And maybe it's okay to be desperately needy...as long as we are desperately needy for the right reasons, and for the right Person. It is often in the times of desperation that the Lord teaches me and reminds me just how desperately I need HIM.
And do I ever need Him.
I need His friendship when I feel like no one understands what I'm going through.
I need His mercy when I lose my patience and speak harsher than I should.
I need His eternal perspective when I'm wading through the piles of laundry, dishes, and dirty diapers.
I need His wisdom when I'm unsure how to train & teach my kids.
I need His discipline when I become me-focused and act selfishly.
I need His words to penetrate my heart when I lie awake worrying how I'll get through tomorrow..."do not worry about tomorrow..."
I need His servant-heart to remind me to put others before myself.
I need His joy in the morning to radiate through me when I feel fatigued and grumpiness starts setting in.
I need His potter hand to mold me and shape me into the woman He wants me to be.
Having no kitchen these days makes meal planning a lot more challenging. Yes, we have been going out to eat a LOT since the kitchen dismantling. I currently do not have use of our oven or stove top either. Washing dishes in the bathroom means I'm looking for recipes that require very few dishes to wash, too. Here are some of my ideas for this week.
Welcome to The Homemaking Pilgrim! Thanks for stopping by. I am the grace-saved daughter of the King, blessed wife of almost 10 years to my best friend, and Mama to 3 sweet children. My greatest desire is to point others to Jesus while living the pilgrim life in a world that is not my home. Join me as I share my passion for homemaking, home schooling, home cooking, motherhood, frugal living, and biblical truth.
Our daughter was diagnosed with severe chronic benign neutropenia. As of March 2012, she is no longer neutropenic! For her story & updates, please scroll down this side column to the section called Labels and click on the link "Updates on Little Bittles."
"Narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it" (from Matthew 7:14)
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